I've take a lot of time to think about our relationship. You and I both know that I am motivated, driven, and passionate about my work. I work hard. I am not going to deny that. I enjoy working hard. It fills my cup. But when the activity behind the hustle isn't purposeful because it's lost in the "grind," then there is nothing in my cup. I've got nothing to give.
But lately, I feel like you've taken advantage of that. Sweet Hustle, or should I call you...
Whatever name you prefer, I have found that you sometimes take the place of what actually matters. You sneak your way into the priorities of my life, and make me forget why I work hard in the first place. Oh and I did a quick background check. Did you know you're defined as, "force (someone) to move hurriedly or unceremoniously in a specified direction." I get exhausted just thinking about you.
You disguise yourself with shiny promises and all things that glitter. You're sly like that, and as much as I appreciate hard work, I can no longer allow your false promies to replace the work that matters most to me: work that makes an impact, work that puts a ding in the universe and work that brings the glory back to Him.
You make me forget my priorities and sometimes you even make me forget my worth. I see through you now.
Make sense? No.
Let me clarify.
I didn't survive cancer to die from stress.
So here's what I decided. I am no longer going to push myself towards the shiny promises. Nope. Instead I am going to pull myself in the direction of the goals that matter. The ones that promise intrinsic reward. The ones that help others. The ones that provide for my family. The ones that make a direct impact on others. The ones that give HIM, not you, the Glory.
So if it takes me a little longer to achieve the goals I know I am put on this earth to achieve, dear Hustle, I assure you the reward will be much more plentiful and enjoyable.
And one more thing...
Above all a title, an income, or whatever worldly achievements you tell me determine my worth, the only title that matters to me...
And just so we are clear, I will always, always work hard. But I won't do it unless it's work that matters. I won't do it to be burned out, deterred, or left feeling unworthy. I think it's ok to not be hustlin' all the time. I think it's ok to take a breath and remember what I'm working towards.
I am better with focus, purpose, love and His grace.
That hustlin' shiz is not my jam.
Thanks for understanding.
|The Mom Who Won't Hustle|
For those who can #hustle and #handleit, I applaud you, but I cannot join you. I think I just need a little room with hard work for rest, grace, and a mustard seed faith.